Thursday: McDonald's Play Place: Home of Infection

I constantly berate germ pits. McDonald's play places are muggy and stagnant, closed off from the main dining area, I am convinced that they breed super germs and no doubt harbor the last remnants of small pox (one of my top ten greatest fears, by the way). Anyway, we were on a long car trip and had no choice, but to stop and let Ivan get out a bit of energy from the long car trip.

As the parent of a small child, your choices for energy release on the road are limited. There is Chic-Fil-A, which I don't necessarily recommend as they have a sectioned off play area that is too tiny for food or tables, so as a parent you are stranded in a glass cubicle with a slide and the type of mayhem that is not at all suited to the space Chic-Fil-A has allowed. There is NEVER a park when you need one while traveling.

McDonald's, in terms of play square footage and the allowance of tables in the play area is your best option. I mean, I would love it if Whole Foods or The Palm had a play area. I would go there, and I would teach Ivan to love both organics and a well prepared steak happily and at peace with our surroundings. Girls like me, however, do not get that lucky.

The only good thing I can say about McDonald's today is that I didn't eat any food there. I brought in my own deli sandwich, which drew weird looks from other parents, but I was not at all ashamed. Now, after Ivan had been playing in the play place for a while with other play place type children, (All play place children run about in herds of frenzy, crawling over each other, squealing, and waving about their happy meal toys. If the parents stepped out even for seconds, it would be like Lord of the Flies.) I overheard some VERY troubling words AND I QUOTE, "He has pink eye. I'm takin' him to the doctor after we leave here". At which point I took panicky respite in the hope that this unsavory mother had left her child at home with his pink eye so as not to spread the infection while she had a leisurely lunch in the McDonald's play place. But no, NO SIR, the next words out of her mouth were, "Hey, come over here and show grandpa your eye". Show his eye he did, all pink and drippy while I was eating my deli sandwich and watching Ivan gleefully eat a french fry off the floor, wipe his eyes and suck his fingers all within a span of two seconds.

Shut it down, you win again McDonald's play place. You win again.