Thursday: News Year's Resolutions

Since the New Year is starting tomorrow (with a 6 mile run and champagne with my running group), I feel that I should address my New Year's resolutions. Since I am both making and writing about my New Year's resolutions, I feel like Bridget Jones. This, in turn, makes me feel that by listing my resolutions some great caper is about to ensue, wherein I will find a great love and lose him and then be forced to take a terrible job where I will have to slide down a fire pole and all of London will see my underwear. It is a great effort to remember that my life is not a novel by Helen Fielding, Jane Austen, or even a screenplay by Nora Ephron. Anyway,

Resolutions are as follows:

• Wake up at 6:00 AM every morning without fail even on Sundays.
• Go to bed at 9:30 or 10:00 PM every night to facilitate above.
• Make it through my one year Bible. I have tried before, and it is rather hard.

These might, in fact, be my first set of resolutions that I have ever formally set down in writing, so maybe that means I will be more likely to make in through them. We shall see.

In other news, I ran 4 miles today, and that is about it on the workout front. I received my heart rate monitor last night, and I paired it with my Gamin today. Disappointing, it seems that the reality of my calorie burning is more like 75 calories per mile as opposed to my estimated 95 calories a mile. My husband thinks that maybe I should do a VO2Max assessment, to make sure that the settings on my Garmin are specific to me, as opposed to the settings that are based on a person of my age, which is apparently how the Garmin gauges me.

Here is what I say to that: This watch was a Christmas gift, not a graduate level research project. I swear, there is only so much time in the day to devote to maximizing my workouts.

Also, I still have not signed up for Todd's January cycling class. Good grief. It is all too much.

I am, however, enjoying American Lion, and today I acquired a lovely new dress at Levy's. A great store in Nashville, that carries some quite fabulous clothes.

Wednesday: Run and Gilad

Today, Ivan appeared to be completely healed from the dastardly croup. It really was a terrible and rather scary illness. Ivan went to sleep in a state of reasonably easy breathing and complete exhaustion. He slept pretty late, allowing me to catch up a bit. Honestly, though, I will tell you that I woke up wearing my haggard mother face, complete with eye bags, blotchiness, and the look of a peevish turtle who might just snap.

I drank copious amounts of tea and had a breakfast of cereal (Kashi Vive and Kashi Summer Berry Granola). They used to be my favorite quick breakfast, especially when Kashi had out their Cocoa Beach Granola. It is truly delicious, and overall, I find Kashi products to be great. There is no beating their fiber content or their sugar when compared with most any breakfast cereal. Anyway, this morning, I decided that I am enjoying my oatmeal with protein powder and a splash of soy milk even more. It is such a great breakfast. GREAT!!!

After pulling myself together a bit, I strapped on my Garmin 310xt and headed out to run. I had the thrilling experience of finding out that my old neighborhood run is longer than I thought. It is more like 3.6 miles as opposed to 3.2 miles. For a while, as I was in the home stretch, I thought it was going to be four miles and I was very excited. But no. I like for my mileage to be flat, so now that I have the luxury of the Garmin, I may alter my route to be exactly four miles.

I ran pretty well, and my current goal for now, may be to even out the middle part of my run, so that all my miles are run at the same pace. I have a really long and really hard hill in the middle of my run, and I may begin sprinting it, in an effort to improve my hill attacks. The Garmin is already inspiring me to greatness.

After my run, I did a great Gilad workout, that focused on my abs. I made Salmon Burgers for lunch with a Recipe that I got from Chris Carmichael's Food for Fitness. They are one of my favorite meals and come to think of it, a lot of meals in his book are amazing. He has a healthy Fettucini Alfredo recipe that is a staple at Sloan manor. I also made a blue cheese cold slaw with a vegan mayonaise, and feel quite healthy. I spent the evening writing oh so polite thank you notes. Oh so polite.

I am now dragging myself to bed with the anticipation of an exciting trip to Green Hills tomorrow where I will go to Teavana. Oh friends, have you been to the mighty Teavana?

Book Report: The Elegance of the Hedgehog by Muriel Barbery

For far too long, I have been plodding my way through The Elegance of the Hedgehog, by Muriel Barbery, translated from the French by Alison Anderson. I read a good bit about the book, which centered around the idea that beauty and intelligence transcends class. The cover was lovely, and I thought it would be an easy read. It was not. Up until the last 100 pages of this 325 page book, it dragged and was rather dark. The book consists of diary entries of the two principal characters.

These first of these characters is Madame Renee' Michel, the concierge at an upscale apartment building in Paris. The second is Paloma Josse. Paloma is a brilliant thirteen year old girl, who is so frustrated by the bourgeoisie comings and goings of her family that she decides that when she is thirteen she will set her family's apartment on fire and kill herself.

So, it sounds dark right. Madame Michel comes from poverty and feels that the is so fated to her class, that she hides her intelligence and pretends to be very dull and uneducated. Paloma functions in a world alone, more intelligent than her family and classmates. She is continually frustrated by the minor prejudices of class and the overlooking of intelligence, art and beauty based on class.

The tone of the apartment building changes when the mysterious Kakuro moves into the building. Immediately, he recognizes that Madame Michel is intelligent based on the fact that her cat is named Leo, after Leo Tolstoy, and see a few upper level library books fall from her pack. Kakuro also recognizes the intelligence and sensitivity of Paloma and invites her to tea. At tea, they talk about the possibility of the distinct intelligence of Madame Michel.

Kakuro and Madame Michel develop a relationship that is supported by Paloma. Kakuro and Madame Michel become closer and closer, hit a snag, work though it and that is all I can tell you.

Overall, I found this book to be a real struggle for a while, but I loved the last 100 pages. I enjoyed the debates on culture and art. For instance, the book debated the superiority of British and French culture. Of course, being a French novel, it felt that French culture was superior. I feel that the idea of cultural superiority comes in far second to that of British resolve and determination, and fear that I judge both countries on their response to Nazi Germany. The British win!!! This book votes the French as culturally superior based on cheese and language.

Anyway, I guess I encourage this book. You will learn many new vocabulary words, and it is quite well written. The Elegance of the Hedgehog is not a light read, which is what I was expecting. It made me wish that my soul-mate would find me based on the fact that I named my cat after an illustrious Russian author. It is rather romantic in the nerdiest sort of way. On to American Lion!!!

Tuesday: The Downward Spiral of Croup

So, at this point, I am heading towards 36 hours of wakefulness with the croup. For those of you who are unfamiliar with the croup, it is a swelling of the vocal chords and trachea. It gives children a cough that sounds like a seal's bark, and it is seriously sad sounding. It will give you some hard-core guilt, it is much worse that when the baby's hands and feet get cold in the jog stroller, or when you are on a long car trip and the crying starts. My day started at midnight last night and I am surviving now on coffee, tea, and the promise of a better tomorrow.

Last night when we arrived home from my Aunt and Uncle's Christmas party, I thought that I would give Ivan a steam bath, and we would all sleep happily ever after. Ah, but no, friends, I got into bed at 11:00 PM and Ivan woke himself up with his wheezing at 11:45ish PM. I rocked him in a panicky mom fashion until 12:00 AM, when I put him in our bed.

In bed with us, I, as usual, began with the delusion that our family bed would be peaceful and we would all be comforted by our togetherness. The fact that I harbored even the faint idea that the family bed would work for the Sloans is as indication that my state of mind was clearly incoherent.

It was three kinds of terrible. It was like the Hindenburg and the Titanic combined. Anyway, at 12:45ish, I began getting kicked in the head while Ivan wheezed. He then kicked me in the collarbone for another half-hour as I nervously tried to read American Lion. I worried about his breathing and WORRIED about his breathing. By 1:30 AM, I realized that we were not going to be able to stay in bed. He was awake and miserable and kicking like a kangaroo. I took Ivan to his bedroom and rocked him over the humidifier while he coughed and wheezed. This lasted until 3:00 AM, at which point I decided that we would watch The Wiggles while sitting upright.

We watched four episodes of The Wiggles. I just want you to know that Anthony Wiggle, who formerly held my affection, is not as attractive at 3:00 AM, or 3:30 AM or 4:00 AM. I call it quits with Anthony Wiggle, his Wiggle World, and his effeminate dancing that manages to come across as charmingly heterosexual all the same.

I put Ivan back to bed breathing relatively well at 4:30 AMish, at which point I got back in bed. Ivan was back up and miserable at 6:30 AMish, but Elliott handled it. I was back up at 7:00 AM to start stalker calling the Doctor's office.

Elliott, Ivan and I staggered into the Doctor's office at the earliest appointment and got a prescription for prednisone, which I thought would cure everything. I knew it could cause a bit of wakefulness, but I thought it would cure the dreaded wheezing that I would call a death rattle in a man 90 years older than my son.

Ivan was having none of his medication. We gave him four doses of prednisone, and he vomited four times immediately after administration. The fourth time, he vomited the entire contents of a bottle the length of the den to the kitchen. The third time, aaaaah well, I would just like to say that if you have never had a toddler vomit the contents of last night's dinner into both bra cups, then you haven't lived. Or you have, or you don't want to, or something.

So, Ivan was unable to keep down any of his medication, and he continued wheezing and refused to sleep. I did have some sort of breakfast, but I never had lunch. I have been holding Ivan since we left the doctor's office. I have given him approximately six steam baths. Then, miraculously, Ivan fell sound asleep while I was holding him and getting brown rice ready to go with dinner one-handed. I put him in bed, and he went right down without a wheeze.

I am waiting for it to all fall apart, but right now we are at three hours of sleep, I have painted my nails a color called "vampire state building", and I am about to crawl in bed with American Lion. It was all worth it for these three hours.

The pic is us on Christmas day, in happier times, when we were all breathing easy!!!

Monday: T.G.I. Friday's Exceeds My Expectations

Now, with a blog post title like today's, I am assuming that we all understand in advance that I did not work out today. For the most part, I feel pretty good about it. What I did do today, however, was a Herculean effort.

Ivan and I stayed at my parents' house last night with the idea that I would leave Ivan with them in the afternoon and accomplish my post-Christmas mall errands. For whatever reason, after Christmas, there always seems to crop up a dozen errands that must be tackled at the local mall or malls. After spending more time than usual at the mall in order to satisfy the conspicuous consumption of an American Christmas, it seems that I am pulled like a magnet back to the mall. It is as if there is a Siren song that I can't say no to, and I really need someone to tie me, like Odysseus, to the mast and ignore my pleas for release no matter the depth of my desire to acquire.

Anyway, I had no faithful crew to stop me, so my friend Robin and I headed to Opry Mills, which is officially one of the worst places in the world. It is, however, full of children's clothing outlets and a Forever XXI. No joke, Forever XXI has some fabulous finds. Their quality is surprising, their fashions are unexpectedly work suitable with a cardigan or turtleneck, and I LOVE IT!!! Before I tell you about my soul-crushing experience at F-XXI, I will mention that I bought Ivan a few shirts and some mittens.

At F-XXI, I found a plum colored satiny dress with razor sliced overlapping layers of plum colored satin that came above my collarbone. My description is not doing the dress proper justice, but suffice it to say that it was the loveliest thing I have seen on a hanger for $36.99. I could just see myself dancing about town wearing it to one party after the next. I often envision myself at the perfect event in the clothes I'm buying, which now that I think about it, are always mythical events that probably only characters on soap operas attend. My big events these days are threatening Ivan with a spanking at the McDonald's play place and picking up take-out from J. Alexander's.

So, back to my F-XXI tragedy. I attempted to try on my plum colored dress, but there was a line, approximately 50 yards long, to get into the dressing room. I was forced to skitter to a mirrored corner of the store and furtively try on my dress over my clothes, as WHO HAS TIME TO WAIT IN A 50 YARD LINE FOR A DRESSING ROOM. Anyway, I discovered that the dress appeared to be a good fit and was envisioning myself in a jaunty pair of heels and the dress dancing away at party that was maybe taking place in Paris on on East Egg. Anyway, when I pulled myself from my reverie, I looked at the line to pay for my great dress, and it was longer that the dressing room line and moving at a snail's pace. The last people in line were actually standing in the mall, mucking up all the pedestrian traffic. SO I GAVE UP. I decided that I would just order it online at home. At home, I found that it was not available on the internet. DEFEATED. I would compare my disappointment to that of Tom Joad (The Grapes of Wrath) when he came home from a miserable prison sentence to find that he must leave the family farm during the Dust Bowl.

Anyway, Robin and I wanted to have lunch together, so we headed to TGI Fridays. TGI Friday's is a place that I associate with desperation and cheese. I have not been there since the 2005 super bowl when I ordered potato skins and felt ill. Anyway, I ordered a pecan encrusted chicken breast salad. It was so good, I did not even need dressing. I am a big fan and would recommend it to anyone suffering the injustice of an Opry Mills shopping experience.

After lunch, I ran errands and met my parents and Ivan for dinner at my Aunt and Uncle's home. It was just great!!! We had a lovely time and headed home early as Ivan had the croupy cough, and we were concerned.

Spent evening managing the croupe. Will update you on conditions tomorrow!!

Sunday: So the Pool is Still Closed

Two days after Christmas and both of my lap pool options are still closed. Also, I am still in the midst of Christmas visiting, so I took the day off after my long run yesterday. Most likely, I will take tomorrow off as well. Tuesday may be a swim and run day and Wednesday will be a longer swim day. Then the pool will close for New Years, and I MUST make the decision about taking Todd's next class. Also, I would like to squeeze in a Hot Yoga or two.

Really, my ideal New Year's resolution is to take one million workout classes, dusk till dawn, and somehow also spend copious amounts of time with my son. While I am pretty sure that it does not work this way, I would like for it to work this way.

Now, today, I slept in and had breakfast, I am fast developing a love affair with my oatmeal/protein powder breakfast. I had that and a LOT of green and white teas. After that, my husband and I got ourselves and the baby ready for church. I am currently spending a lot of time in my True Religion Supervixen Disco Billy jeans (which have a good thick denim that maintains its shape) and cashmere turtlenecks from J Crew. This is what I wore to Church, and I felt pretty fabulous. Church is not a fashion show, and I realize that my clothing choices are not what matters. My point is that I love to have a "go-to" outfit and black jeans are my new dress pant; just to keep you in my loop. Also, I wore a lovely blue double cloth trench which I Ebay-ed from J. Crew a few years ago. It still thrills my heart to see it in my closet. Please tell me you are Ebay-ing!!!!!

Now, as we were approaching the our church, Elliott mentioned that he thought that they had actually cancelled the second service for today. While, it actually would have been even better if he had mentioned this last night or even this morning when I was hustling everyone in their Sunday finery, he was indeed right. We pulled into our parking space in time to see everyone shaking hands and climbing into their cars to go home. SO, we headed to Starbucks and had breakfast and coffee with some neighbors, who had actually listened in church last Sunday to the all important Christmas holiday service schedule and gotten to church on time.

We had a nice time, but are unchurched this Sunday all the same.

At home, Ivan had a nap and I packed up to head out to my parents' house to spend the evening having dinner with Mom and Daddy, and then visiting with friends in the evening.

Today was a pretty good Perricone day, but for a small melt-down with a bit of fudge pie while visiting friends.

Heading to bed with American Lion. Look for my book report on The Elegance of the Hedghog. It turned out quite well in the end.

Christmas Holiday Eating Discussion

If I were a famous historical figure, right now, at this very moment, I would be Marie Antoinette: not because there is an imminent beheading or because I truly do love clothes. No, I would compare myself to Marie Antoinette because I have lived for two days on soft cheeses, chocolates, bleached flour and refined sugar.

It is true and lamentable, because just as my nutrition maven, Dr Perricone, warned, my eyes are puffy and I have the look of the ill-fed. For this reason, I am Periconing myself for the rest of the week and maybe the month.

Dr. Perricone's philosophy is to avoid foods that cause inflammation and water-retention in your system. He feels that inflammation and water-retention are caused by foods that have a high glycemic index and cause your blood sugar to spike. His lifestyle is heavy in fish (specifically salmon) fresh greens, berries, flax seeds, olive oil, greek yogurt, sweet potatoes, green and white teas (unsweetened), old fashioned oatmeal, ect. Obviously, most of his food recommendations are common sense, but I notice that I look better and rest better when these things are a large part of my life, along with eliminating all aspects of my Marie Antoinette diet.

Today, was a great day food wise.

• Pre-run breakfast - oatmeal with a scoop of protein powder, tea, and a berry bar, water
• Post-run breakfast - eggs with turkey sausage
• Lunch - brown rice sushi with salmon, three clementines, some almonds and walnuts
• Dinner- soup with lots of cabbage, peppers, spinach, onion

Now, I did have a small food meltdown, at 6:00 when I got seriously hungry while preparing dinner, and I made Ivan some Kraft Easy Mac. It consists of microwaved noodles that are not even curved in such a way as to be real macaroni with a powdered cheese which I find reminescent of the residue at the bottom of a bag of Cheetos. I made this for Ivan to eat, because I knew he would enjoy it enough to practice his spoon eating. This was true, but I was forced to indulge in several taste tests "to make sure it wasn't too hot". Also, I had a glass of wine, which is not in the plan. After this bottle is finished off, I am eliminating alcohol, and sometimes, I think I am eliminating it forever. I can really only drink anything alcoholic on Saturday, which is the only night that does not precede an early morning workout for me. Probably not eliminating it forever.

Saturday: 18 Miles the Day After Christmas with the Garmin 310xt

Oh friends, we are one "jing jingler and hoo hoobler" over the limit here in Sloan-ville. I absolutely Grinched out when I came in from my run this morning and found that Ivan was riding his singing rocking horse (I'm a little pony, clippity-clop, clippity clop, Such a pretty pony, clippity -clop, clippity-clop, I love to have my hair brushed beneath the old oak tree), while leaving his race-car console going, and squeezing his Baby Einstein car key set (which sets off a car alarm sound) while watching The Wiggles. "That's the one thing I hate: All the noise, noise, noise, noise!" I had to confiscate a few noisy things and pack them away. I am embarrassed to say that when I woke up this morning, I wished I could shut down our Christmas tree like an umbrella, just like the Grinch. I am thrilled that I can take down the tree. Between Ivan and the cat, I am just surprised that poor faux tree is still standing.

Anyway, Christmas was ever so lovely. I thoroughly enjoyed myself and received a cashmere sweater, Mizuno running shoes, a lovely pearl necklace, two books, a new raincoat, new perfume and THE GARMIN 310 XT. What bounty!!!

The Garmin is clearly the frontrunner for favorite gift received, but everything else is great as well. Now, the Garmin is a GPS system that automatically tracks my exact mileage and my splits. When I am finished with a workout, I just plug in a chip to my computer, and it automatically sends all the information into a spreadsheet so that I can see each mile-split, my elevation changes, and calories burned.

I ran eighteen miles, beginning at 6:00 AM. Now, the beauty of my watch was that we knew that we were approaching over 16 miles and we needed to add on to make 18 miles. After consulting my watch, we decided that we needed to add on 1.6, and we did this almost exactly. Then, we understood that we had run around an 8 mile pace throughout the run, which felt quite comfortable and conversational. This is great and gives me hope that my Boston training will go smoothly.

At home, I pulled up the spreadsheet of our mileage, splits and elevation and watched the map as my computer took me virtually over our route (please click on the links and look at the spreadsheets and such!!!) Then, I was able to send all this information to the people I ran with this morning. SO EXCITING. I burned 1700ish calories. Now, I am planning on figuring out how to put this all on the blog, because I am going to completely nerd out with the Garmin!! The Garmin has without a doubt revolutionized my athletic life.

At home, Ivan and I have gone for a long walk, played endlessly with noisy toys and watched the Wiggles. A lovely Christmas!!

Thursday: Christmas Eve Run

I love that on holidays, my running group generally organizes a run. Today we met at 7:00 AM for a 6 mile run. We met at the gates of Percy Warner park and left from there. There was a huge group at the outset of the run, so I got to catch up with several people I had not seen in a long time. Also, the entire group ran the same route, which never happens. The whole group ran the first two miles at a relaxed pace, so there was a lot of chatting. For instance, I learned that Lanse had read Olive Kitteridge , which is a book that I asked for for Christmas. He gave it a great review.

I learned all about Sam's master's thesis, which will involve a comparison of how different Jewish authors (maybe women authors) define success. AND, very exciting, he is getting to go to NYU and learn Yiddish this summer. Have you ever heard anything so fascinating on your morning run?

Finally, I had a long talk about Garmin heart-rate monitor GPS systems with Chris and John. John has a 20% coupon that he will let me use if I want to buy my own. My heart rate monitor broke, and I have been bereft without it. I really would like to have something that tracks my mileage and keeps a record of my pace and lets me know which zone I am running in for the duration of my workouts. I feel that this is the Garmin Forerunner 310 XT. I think I would get a lot out of my workouts and be able to track them at a more in-depth level. Right now, my tracking is "I ran four miles today" or "I ran long today and went about 13 miles".

Now, as I was running with Chris and John, they were able to tell me that we ran the first two miles at a 7:58 pace, before stepping up to a 7:35ish pace for the last four. Such great information.

It made me realize that, as usual, I am the person that jumps out to run and tags along. I may be running 7 minute miles, I may be running 8 minute miles and I am totally dependent on someone else to tell me how far I have gone. I'm not really keeping track, I am just running. A little more Forrest Gump and a little less Prefontaine. The same with biking, I am just tooling along. Maybe a heart rate monitor would take me to the next level. Maybe, I would take a more scientific approach to my training and not just be along for the ride.

Anyway, I have to make this decision before January 4th, which is when John's coupon runs out. I could also just try to hang with John on runs, as he can drill it. Whenever I run with he and Chris, it seems that we are chatting about our children, and then suddenly it is an all out sprint to the finish with farther left to run than I can sprint.

After my run, I wrapped up my Christmas presents, put Ivan down for a nap (after he had colored my laptop with a ill-tended sharpie marker), and packed up to head out to my mom and dad's house. Every year, we have a dinner of shrimp gumbo on Christmas Eve. Some of our neighbors and my aunt and uncle were in attendance. It was such a great evening, which I finished up by visiting my friends Robin and Jeremy, who were staying at their parents house around the corner.

Such a lovely night!!!!!

Wednesday: Swim/ Run/ Gilad

Today, I had my annual Christmas gym misunderstanding. I seriously do it every year. I get up early and think that the gym around the corner is open until Christmas Eve, when really it closes on December 22nd. So, I got up early to swim on my own before going for a run and getting in my Gilad workout.

Of course, when I got to the gym, it was closed until after Christmas. So, I had to go back home and take Ivan on jog stroller run, before getting ready head out to my usual pool. My run was great, and Ivan had not been in the jog stroller in a good while and seemed to really enjoy it. After that, I loaded myself into the car and headed to my usual pool. I only swam a quick half mile, dropped off gifts for the great nursery workers at the gym, and headed in to hang out with Ivan's swim coach Kennette. We had GREAT visit, and I came home to hang out with Ivan while my husband went to bike.

Ivan had a long walk and a great nap. I got in a Gilad set, and it was really a lovely day. Christmas Eve run with my running group tomorrow morning!!

Tuesday: Monday Taught Me Nothing

Today, I made an ill-thought decision to take Ivan to the mall with me while I did a bit of last minute Christmas shopping and had a trip to the new Lululemon store here in Nashville. Ivan was a champion at Lululemon and he was reasonably well-behaved while we went to the Cosmetic Market. After these two stops, we had to go to the mall for two last gifts.

The mall induces in Ivan a frenzy that is rarely seen in human children. I am not sure if it is too many stimuli all at once or the fact that he can hear and see other children running about. I have no idea. I do know that while I was at The Body Shop, Ivan wrenched himself out of his stroller and sprinted around the store like a full-on lunatic. After I tackled him, I tried to get him to the bathroom for a spanking, but, of course, it was closed for cleaning. So, I did the next best thing, which was to get him a chocolate lollipop from the See's candy people. This kept Ivan quiet and happy for several minutes, until I noticed that the entire chocolate lollipop was melted down the front of his lovely outfit, the same outfit, incidentally, that he ruined before we went to the neighborhood party on Saturday night.

The chocolate lollipop melting was pretty serious. It looked like he had thrown himself into a mud puddle. I tried to pick him up and I am pretty sure that it ruined my favorite scarf. If that amount of chocolate ever is dry cleaned out of my scarf, I will be SHOCKED. In Ivan's diaper bag, I did have a a change of clothes, which was an old pair of footie pajamas. They had something crusty dried to the bottom and the foot was a bit soggy where his sippy cup had leaked. It was, however, our only option. After this my parents came and gave me 15 minutes of respite before I had to get home. I mean, by this point in my ill-thought excursion, I was at the end of my rope and wanted nothing better than to get in the car and go home.

At home, I had a defeated dinner of cereal and soy milk. Ivan went to bed, and I am watching The Brothers Bloom. It is visually lovely, but a confusing story line. I will say, though, that this movie used a Bob Dylan song from Nashville Skyline (I'll be Sleeping Here tonight) and a Cat Steven Song from Tea for the Tillerman (Miles from Nowhere) to perfection. PERFECTION. I am downloading them tonight.

No exercise today. Good for Me!!

Monday: A Swim and Maybe I am Smoking Crack

There are several reasons why I might be smoking crack today. First, after swimming over three miles yesterday, I woke up this morning and went to swim. Albeit, I did go late and only swam a 2000 or so, I still went. Workout as follows:

• 300 swim
• 300 pull
• 300 swim
• 600 kick
• 200 swim

So, slightly less than 2000. But after my ridiculous week of holiday running about, getting my hair done at 8:00 PM last night, and coming down with a cold as of this morning, I still went to swim.

After swim is when I started to seriously doubt my sobriety. Today was Morning Swim Christmas Lunch at J. Alexanders. Now, in my opinion, J. Alexander's is one of the most dependable restaurants in town. It is Winter, so they are having their seasonal braised cabbage, and I can't even tell you how excited I was. I was so excited.

Now, I had some foreboding before we arrived at J. Alexander's, as I knew that there was the possibility of a public meltdown. So, we arrived at J. Alexander's early, and I decided that we had enough time to go to Target. Now at Target, we had a relatively major meltdown when Ivan wrested himself from his stroller and threw himself to the floor. Now, at this point I gave Ivan a harsh talking to and stuffed him, stubbing, into this stroller and high-tailed it back to J. Alexander's.

There was no chance of a successful meal at J. Alexanders. There were seven adults having lunch, and Ivan either screamed, kicked, or wrestled away from me and sprinted through the restaurant throughout most of the meal. The waitstaff shot me several looks that I could only interpret as hateful and damning as Ivan sprinted between their legs and tried endlessly to get into the kitchen. When he was in my lap, he was screaming and when he was on the ground, he was running and screaming. When I strapped him into his high chair he took his decibel level up by 50% and ruined conversation for all diners within 50 yards. Why did I take him?? Why? Why? Why?

I wanted to go to lunch and eat their seasonal delicacies, but no, I treated myself and everyone for miles to a scream-fest of seasonal misery. I just wish I could even remember what my salmon and braised cabbage tasted like. I wish that Ivan had not grabbed my hand-wash only shirt with his french-fry greasy hands. I wish I had been smart enough to ask if Ivan could spend the afternoon with my parents or that I had gotten a sitter.

What I wish most of all is that I would stop deluding myself that any public outing with Ivan was going to go smoothly, that I could ever eat in peace, or that I could wear a cute outfit and not have it royally ruined or that I could wear a cute outfit that did not get pulled by Ivan so that it exposed some part of me that had best been left covered.

Hard times, friends. Tomorrow, I am going to devote myself to nothing higher than getting the rest of the Christmas cards in the mail and painting my nails.

The bright spot of today was that I received my "I LOVE WINSTON CHURCHILL" t-shirt!!!

Sunday: The Best Christmas Pageant Ever and I Swam 5000 Meters

So this morning, I had a cup of tea by myself before the baby woke up, and then commenced getting us all ready so that we could get to church, and Ivan could be a star in the Christmas pageant. Now, we all knew that this would be a raving disaster, but that was hardly the point. It was a really lovely event. Now the older kids, had speaking parts, which were mainly the prophecies of Isiah and the words of the angel bearing the good news and the words of Mary. In between readings we sang Christmas carols. Now the star, was a large construction paper star on a stick which Ivan was supposed to hold above his head. Now Ivan was so pleased to brandish his star for a brief period of time. After he bored of star waving, the older children tried to herd him into the proper position, which he was willing to maintain for a while, but then the show was over for him. Ivan wandered about looking at the other children and looking far too interested in the ladder that was reserved for the child playing the North Star. Now, I am posting a few pictures that are not great. I was so frenzied as I fast-walked back and forth across Otey Hall trying to keep close enough to grab Ivan should he get too out of hand. It made it hard to get in very good pictures.

Overall, the pageant was just wonderful, and I hope that Ivan will be involved every year. The pageant was followed be a lovely church service and then some breakfast at Starbucks with my parents.

At home, we put Ivan down for his nap and had some lunch and I left for swim. Today was a big day in the annals of swim. We were assigned to swim fifty 100 meter intervals at a sub-two minute pace. I dove in a 2:30 PM and swam for one hour and 48 minutes. This was over three miles, and I am proud to say that I actually held 1:50 to 1:45 minute intervals the whole time. It was quite intense and crowded, as lots of great swimmers showed up to swim such a distance.

I stopped by Yogurt World on the way home. It is definitely my new after-swim thing.

Watching Cranford, maybe the best mini-series ever!!!

Now, my favorite picture from the pageant is the one where Ivan is looking at the camera and the great boy in the background has thrown his head back and put his hand over his face in frustration that Ivan will not stay in his spot!

Saturday: 11.2 miles and a most Unfortunate Incident (to say the least)

So last night, I worked on Christmas cards and watched Funny People. It was actually the most heartwarming crass movie I have ever seen. I watched it one and a half times, and though I have basically been worn out with Adam Sandler since the inception of his career, I sort of love him in this movie. It generally has a self-deprecating tone towards all his other movies, and it makes me feel better about him. Seth Rogan was absolutely endearing and all the cameos and other actors were just great. I recommend it, but bear in mind that it is CRASS. OH SO CRASS.

I enjoyed it so much I stayed up a bit later than intended, as I was getting up at 5:15 AM for an 11.2 mile run. I made it to bed a bit before 10:00 PM, but I am currently having a (nerd-alert) huge cross word puzzle love affair. I have a new New York times book of Monday/Tuesday crosswords, so they are very pleasant to do in bed. Anyway, I got involved with one of those, so it was 10:15 PM before I turned out my light.

Now, when I woke up this morning, it was supposed to be cold and snowy, but of course it was rather warm and rainy. So, I had to change out my clothes and turn on all the lights in the bedroom and dig through my drawers to find cooler clothes. This put me a bit late to the park, and I held up my group. It all worked out, and I ran 11.2 miles with Ed and Lynn. They were a great group, and I felt like I pushed myself a bit. I rather meant to run longer, but by the time I got to the car I was wet and the temperature was dropping and I headed home. Eleven miles is nothing to sneeze at, but I felt a little guilty as everyone else evened out the a solid 12 miles and Ed even tacked on more. At home I napped a bit, before beginning Christmas card madness. I can't even talk about Christmas card madness, but it is coming to a mailbox near you.

Now after Christmas card madness, I began to get ready for our neighborhood's Christmas party. Elliott had brought me home a bottle of organic wine, which I decided to try while I was in the getting ready stage. I walked from my desk to my bedroom to get earrings, and immediately heard a crash. When I responded to the crash by sprinting through the house like Usain Bolt in heels, I found Ivan looking like the Pig's Blood Scene from Carrie. He had somehow reached my glass of wine and dumped it directly on top of his head and onto his party outfit. The wine glass shattered all over the floor, and I just dumped a full bottle of Spray and Wash with Resolve Power on the wine stains and took Ivan to the tub and put him in. In the tub, I noticed that Ivan left a bloody handprint on the tiles. SO, we also had an injury and by the time Ivan got out of the bath and had a band-aid and a new (and inferior) party outfit we were an hour and a half late to a party we had no business taking a baby to in the first place.

At the party, Ivan was reasonably behaved, and we were able to catch up with our neighbors as it was a neighborhood party. While at the party, one of my neighbors asked how old my husband and I were. When I told them that I was 33 and my husband was 44, she responded by saying, "Well, your husband doesn't look 44". Which means what, neighbor?? Does it mean that I look my age, and he doesn't. I swear, I almost shed tears into my plate of brie and crackers. I mean it had been a hard night. I had been awake since 5:15 AM and had a major wine glass disaster before we walked out the door. I totally need a vacation.

Watching SNL with James Franco!!!

Friday: 5:45 AM Bike Class and Maybe Ivan and the Cat are in Cahoots

This morning when my alarm went off at 5:00 AM, I hopped out of bed enthusiastically to head out to my last bike class of the series. When I arrived at the class, I realized that I am having real difficulty with bike motivation. There was a feeling of dread as I hooked my bike to the trainer and suited up in my shoes. I enjoy swimming. I enjoy running. Why is it that I have such antipathy for the bike? It is just that I seem not to be improving and I seem not to be falling in love with the bike any more. I do WANT to improve, and I think that Todd, who teaches my bike class, is three kinds of fabulous. When I see my bike, however, I am confronted with serious dread. Anyway, I did get through the class with lots of one leg drills where I could only keep my RPMs at like 87. This guy in my class though, Ashley Dewberry, kept his at 122. 122 can you believe it? He also runs a three hour marathon. Will he go pro? What else can you do with that sort of massive athletic ability? Surely, this means you are going to the Olympics.

Anyway, I made it through class. At the end, Todd asked me if I was signing up for the next session, to which I replied, "I really don't want to. I want to take 5 weeks off." We all know, however, that after 5 weeks, I will be worse and everyone who did sign up for the next session will be better, so that when I do go back I will be worse and more discouraged. SO, I should sign up for the next session, but I must think about this for a while. I did like burning 2000 calories before 7:30 in the morning. Todd is super. I am so talking myself into it.

After bike class, I got ready to go to a women's Christmas coffee, so headed into town and had a lovely time. I also bought Ivan a pair of knee socks at Helen's, for all his knee sock wearing activities.

At home, I am pretty sure that Ivan and the cat are in cahoots. I have moved all the ornaments to the top of the tree, but today, I found two chili pepper ornaments in Ivan's pajamas, and I have noticed the cat climbing the tree. So, I have upped both ornament surveillance and feline terror watch. Christmas is in a week. I can make it until then.

Thursday: Pictures with Santa

Today, I was up and at 'em at an appropriate time. It was cold, but I was still able to get in a comfortable run, before coming home to begin the whirlwind of getting ready to tote myself, my husband and my child to the Green Hills Mall for pictures with Santa. Now today, I put my foot down and took a shower alone. It was briefly sad, but infinitely blissful. I had to shut the bathroom door in Ivan's face, and he sobbed pitifully outside, until his father came to collect him. I conditioned my hair for an extensive amount of time and shaved thoroughly. It was just lovely.

Anyway, about the time I was getting to the hairstyling portion of my getting ready process, Ivan forced himself through the bathroom door and hugged my legs as if he were Moses and I were Jochebed and we had been parted for years. After much running around and much angry shouting to one another "ARE YOU READY" "DID YOU REMEMBER THE CAMERA/ SIPPY CUP/ EXTRA WIPES/ A BIB/ YOUR SELF-RESPECT/ BASIC HUMAN DIGNITY/ ENJOYMENT OF LIFE".

Once all these things were loaded into the car, we headed into Green Hills. Now, I am a huge fan of the Green Hills Santa. He is personable, knowledgeable about how to stop a fleeing baby, and very good natured about all the screaming and crying. All things that are INTEGRAL to a mall Santa.

Ivan is totally fine with being handed to a mall Santa as if it were our last goodbye and he was going to live at the North Pole with he and Mrs. Clause. He does not even look at me twice. He just cuddled right up in Santa's lap and let the cares of the world fall away. There was a blissful smile and a lot of snuggling. Now the children that went before Ivan screamed as if being murdered in a heinous and public fashion and the child who went after Ivan, wailed until he was sobbing so hard he couldn't breath. Ivan was loathe to leave Santa and gave him several parting hi-fives. After the picture, we wandered about the mall purposelessly. While I had much that needed to be accomplished at the mall, you can accomplish NOTHING while shopping with a 20 month old. I used every ounce of purpose left in my body to try to keep Ivan from pushing his stroller into other other people walking around the mall.

At home, Ivan watched The Wiggles and I straightened the house. In the evening, I got myself together and met my fabulous running friends at the Crow's Nest in Green Hills for some dinner. We had great talks about last night's running party and delicious tuna ahi salads. Such a surprise for sports bar fare.

Now, I don't know if you remember that last week I was in Birmingham and made two trips to Yogurt Mountain. I said that we had a similar yogurt venue that had just opened in Franklin and tonight I tried it out. Yogurt World is the name and it is truly spectacular. It was equally as good as Yogurt Mountain and maybe even offered more fresh fruit options. I loved the self-serve option and got to try several flavors including triple chocolate and pomegranate. before I decided on pistachio and chocolate with fresh strawberries and Andes mints. Oh it was a lovely night indeed. 5:45 AM bike class. I am crawling into bed with a crossword puzzle!!

Pics are the 2008 Santa pic and the 2009 Santa Pic!!!!

Wednesday: Morning Swim and Christmas Party

This morning it was quite cold out. Let me let you in on a secret: On the first morning of a cold snap the water is freezing. By the second morning the pool staff has turned up the heat and leveled out the water temperature, and the water is fine. Frozen ground means a very cold swim. All that to say that today was the first day of the cold snap, and it took my breath away when I dove into the water. I thoroughly hate it when the water is cold, and I would love to spend the rest of my blog entry complaining: just griping about how it took me several laps to warm up and how once I got out of the pool, I was shivering so that I could hardly speak. I am not warm yet.

Despite the cold, I had a lovely swim. Workout as follows:

• 500 swim @ 8:00
• 4 x 50 kick
• 5 x 100 swim @ 1:45 (odd IM/ even free)
• 200 kick
• 200 pull
• 500 pull @ 7:30
• 4 x 50 kick
• 5 x 100 (odd kick/ even free)
• 200 kick
• 200 pull

This was 3200 meters, and it was just a great swim. I am really enjoying Mike being there as he keeps everyone on interval. Jaime was there today, and we did lots of kicks and totally mommed out and discussed teething.

After swim, I headed home and played with Ivan while I cleaned up around the house and fed us both some lunch. I had some turkey for lunch today and then some broccoli stir-fried with raw almonds and sunflower seeds. I stir-fried these in some oil, soy sauce and a bit of chopped sushi ginger. It was crazy delicious.

After lunch, Ivan had a nap, and I got ready to head into town to meet up with my husband's grandmother. We had a great time and I headed into work and from there to my running group party.

Running group party = lots of fun. I had great book talks and apparel debates. It is such an eclectic group of individuals with so many interests. I learned about a new book called Homer and Langley. It is by E.L. Doctorow, an author I have never read, but have always wanted to. So, I might plan to read that after my next non-fiction which is definitely American Lion. I am pretty excited about it.

Watching American Experience: The Story of Seabiscuit. Aaaaah, PBS!!!!!

Tuesday: A Stellar Day

I mean, if you were going to compare me to an insect today, you would compare me to an ant - a diligent accomplisher of things. All day, I accomplished. For someone who is so accomplishment driven and who so often oversleeps, today I proved to myself that I could do both things and sit down at the end of the day quite satisfied. Everyone overslept today and when I hauled myself out of bed, I was so busy attending to Ivan, that I did not get out the door to run until later. I ended up getting breakfast and making tea and doing some paperwork.

Fabulous breakfast by the way. It was a bit life-changing and very simple. I microwaved a half cup of quaker oats in a full cup of water for 4 minutes. When it came out, I added a scoop of chocolate protein powder and a splash of vanilla soy milk. I wish that I had the words to convey to you just how delicious it was and so filling. I was not hungry again until after my normal lunchtime.

After breakfast and clean-up, I got on my clothes was able to get in a 5 mile run at a pretty quick clip. At home, I was able to get in a Gilad workout, before Ivan and I watched an episode of The Wiggles. I am amazed that Ivan will sit for a solid 15 minutes and watch The Wiggles, though I guess that I should be grateful. After The Wiggles, we read Goodnight Moon, which Ivan is loving right now. He loves it when the old woman whispers "hush", and it is totally sweet like a Hallmark commercial and a Lifetime movie rolled into one.

When Ivan went down for his nap, I climbed onto the trainer and got in a trainer ride while I watched some more of Frank Capra's World War II Why We Fight series. I am not enjoying riding the trainer without a heart rate monitor. I really liked the accountability of the heart rate monitor, so I guess I will be saving up for a new one. I am, however, enjoying Frank Capra's Why We Fight series. It is rather amazing, and I have now have a complete understanding of the Maginot Line. I thought it was a line like the Mason-Dixon line, but it was a very long under and above ground fortress where soldiers could live and tanks and such could be stored. Brilliant. I may have underestimated you French.

After my workout, I got into the shower and got ready for work and running errands. I headed out to pick up some Christmas presents and a new pair of running shoes for me. I had a great evening at work and then came home to do some ironing. So much accomplished. What a great day. Sitting in front of the fire and getting ready to knit. Swim tomorrow!!!

Pics are of the den, which is looking especially cozy.

Monday: Back in the Saddle for the Most Part

This week is the busiest of my work weeks all year. It is student exam week, and I am sprinting around studying, meeting, and discussing with parents. I work twice as much as usual and am a flurry of babysitters and scheduling conflicts. Already, I have scheduled a a hair appointment on top of a party and had to change it. For this reason, I now have a hair appointment on Saturday night at 8:00 PM. Also, Christmas parties are happening left and right, so I alway think that if I can make it through this week, I will be able to breathe again.

Anyway, I did not get up early enough to run this morning, though that was my intention. Ivan and I headed out the door to swim, where he was so excited to get to the nursery to play with toys. He hugged all the nursery workers and was loathe to leave when I returned to pick him up. Swim was quite nice today. I always love it when I feel the pool jets kicking out cold water, because it means that the pool is a little warmer than necessary and they are trying to cool it down. When I dove in today, it felt great. Mike was there today, and we swam together. Workout as follows:

• 200 swim/ 200 pull/ 200 kick
• 6 x 200 swim (Odd IM/ Even Free)
• 300 kick
• 8 x 100 pull @ 1:50
• 5 x 50 swim @ 0:45

This ended up being 3150 meters. A pretty good workout and some good IM practice. My butterfly does not seem to be improving. At home, I played with Ivan, read some stories, and returned some phone calls. When Ivan went down for a nap, I did 3.5 chin-ups and headed into work. I actually arrived home rather early this evening, and should have done some weight workouts and such, but I crawled around with Ivan and read some more stories. When Ivan went to bed, I began watching the movie that I have been waiting since summer for: Harry Potter and the Half Blood-Prince. I have been excited about it all weekend.

Now the book was just great, and the movie was equally riveting. My only big disappointment with the movie was that the book opened with the Wizard Prime Minister meeting with the Muggle Prime Minister and the movie ignored this completely. This made me sad, as I totally love wizard/muggle interactions. The movie's budget must have been a cajillion dollars, and it is just visually lovely. Hogwarts architecture is lighted in many different ways and the CGI, doesn't look like CGI. In my nerdiest heart of hearts, I would really like to take a wizard tour of England, after which I will take a National Trust tour of England. If I win the lottery, friends, I am going to nerd out. I am going to pack up my knitting and a million crossword puzzles and hit the English Countryside.

Off to bed and three more pull-ups. My goal is 10 at one time.

Saturday/ Sunday: Nothing Much

Yesterday, I hung out in Birmingham with my sister and we shopped about. I have a great new shirt, I spent time with my nephew Rye, and I got to try Yogurt Mountain not once but twice. Yogurt Mountain is self-serve ice cream with a multitude of toppings including (contain yourselves) Pop Tarts and Andes Mints. All of which you get to self serve and then pay by weight. Both times I had chocolate mint yogurt with Andes Mint toppings. The deliciousness of the yogurt may have negated the presence of ice cream in my life. I, Betsy Sloan, may be finished with ice cream. I know that yogurt is not calorically comparative to a piece of lettuce, but it is better than ice cream by about 300 calories. For this reason, I am a convert. Now, in Franklin and Nashville we have just gotten Sweet Cece's and Yogurt World. Now Yogurt World apparently just opened this weekend and does not even have a website yet, but it has the same self-serve concept as Yogurt Mountain. So, my new after-swim treat is going to be a trip to Yogurt World as I can drive right past on the way home from swim. I am pretty excited about it.

Worked a bit tonight and am hopping back in workout saddle tomorrow!!!!!

Friday: 5:45 AM Bike Class before 8:30 AM Swim and the Australian Ironman of Shame

So, this morning I was up at 5:01 AM and I made it to my class slightly early. I have been filled with trepidation about returning to bike class since I came in last the previous week. It was a blow to my ego. Anyway, today we did a warm-up and then some tempo riding, before doing one-leg drills. I will not lie to you and tell you that one-leg drills are either easy or enjoyable. They are neither of these things. Todd attempted to have us ride clipped into our pedals with just one leg with no chopping. By no chopping, I mean that as you rotate your foot through the pedal stroke you are completely smooth, WITH JUST ONE LEG. I never succeeded in getting through a pedal drill with no chopping, and maybe I was cursing under my breath the whole time, and when I say maybe, it means I definitely was.

Now, after finishing the pedal drills and the tempo riding, Todd had us ride an Ironman Australia course. It was really interesting actually, and Todd hid our status from us on the big screen, so that we could not see how we were performing next to our classmates. It was kind of like Montessori school. Anyway, the trainer program added resistance on the uphills of the course and let off on resistance as we went downhill. It was as if we were riding the actual course. The ocean looked beautiful, and I felt like I was riding at top speed, but when Todd cleared the computer, I had out my eagle eye as the results briefly popped up on screen, and I saw that I had only ridden 12 mph, throughout the Australia Ironman ride. My place was second to last, which I guess was better than dead last, but this class is undoubtedly taking a toll on my athletic ego. Todd asked if I was signing up for the next series, but I really need 6 weeks off to recover my self-esteem. At which point I will be 6 weeks worse than I am now, so maybe I should sign up for the next course. My thought was 6 weeks on and then 6 weeks off, though I might need to rethink.

Anyway, I came home and packed up to go to swim class. Swim was great. Workout as follows:

• 300 swim/ 200 drill
• 4 x 100 kick @ 2:00
• 4 x 150 swim @ 2:30
• 5 x 100 kick @ 2:00
• 6 x 100 swim @ 1:50
• 2 x 300 pull @ 6:00

This was 3200 meters in all, and I felt pretty good for my bike workout. At home, Ivan and I hung out until my parents arrived to visit with Ivan. After their visit and Ivan's nap, I loaded up my car and headed to Birmingham to help out my sister with baby Rye for the weekend. Had sushi for dinner and headed to bed early!!

Thursday: Veritable Day Off

So, today I really slept late. My husband was home, and he took over morning duties. When I say I overslept, I seriously overslept. I staggered out of bed and burned a waffle for breakfast. Lately, all I can do is set a waffle on fire. What is wrong with me? We put the toaster away to free up counter space, and I am attempting to broil my Kashi strawberry flax waffles. I am clearly not cut out to manually toast food, which leads me to my long term suppressed fear that I would not be able to survive after the appocalypse. I mean I was throwing the burned waffles away, but after two mornings of that, I decided I couldn't waste waffles in such a fashion, and I scrape them in what is becoming a rather depressing morning ritual. I clearly need to buy more cereal.

Anyway, I had to take Ivan out to the McDonald's play place today, because it was too cold to play outside. It was just freezing outside. FREEZING. Ivan ran about for an hour before we went to get him some new shoes. At home, I put Ivan down for a nap and then got in a 3.4 mile run at an 8 minute-mile pace. At home, I took a shower and got ready to head into work.

Work was lovely and involved two oatmeal cookies. At home, I had a late dinner and I am back in the saddle tomorrow for swim class and Gilad, before I head to Birmingham and my sitter's wedding in Atlanta!!!

Wednesday: Morning Swim and Chin-Ups

This morning, my husband kept the baby and let me just tell you how quickly I was able to get out of the house. I was at the pool five minutes early and hopped right in on time to get in 3850 meters. YES, almost 4000 meters. Needless to say, I am quite proud of myself. Workout as follows:

• 2 x 400 (drill/swim)
• 2 x 400 (swim/swim)
• 50 swim
• 5 x 100 free @ 1:50
• 2 x 200 free @ 3:40
• 400 pull
• 2 x 200 free @ 3:40
• 5 x 100 free @ 1:50

It was great. I came home and did a few pull-ups. I did three pull-ups at home, and three more at work, and I fully intend to do three more before I go to bed. I was going to go back to swim tonight for my usual Double-Swim Wednesday, but can I just tell you. The pool was quite cold this morning and there was a meet the previous weekend, and apparently they ramp up the chlorine after the meet. My skin feels like it might all peel off and my eyes have been watering all day. Also, I am quite busy at work, so I took tonight off. Good for me!!!! Off to knit!!!!

Tuesday: A Most Successful Day

It is monsooning, here. Right about the time I was ready to run, the sky opened up with the kind of billowing rain that was blowing sideways and heralding a trip to Oz. For this reason, I drank a few extra cups of tea and made my way to the gym around the corner for a tempo run on the treadmill. I rarely go to the gym around the corner from my house, but it is quite handy for a quick three miler at race pace when I need a treadmill, or if I am injured (saints preserve us) and need an elliptical machine. The pool is kept slightly warmer for senior citizen water aerobics, so it is hard to swim farther than a mile. I depend on the Concord Road rec center for heavy duty swimming.

I got in my run, while Ivan stayed at home. Then he and I cleaned up the kitchen and watched The Wiggles. He is teething something fierce and also being weaned off the bottle. It is a tough week. I would think being weaned off a bottle would be something like quitting smoking, and Ivan is exhibiting what I think would be typical of smoker's withdrawal irritibility. For this reason, I have seen two episodes of The Wiggles today while holding Ivan in my lap.

I could tell you how I have all of The Wiggles ridiculous songs memorized and constantly streaming in my brain or how I have developed a crush on Anthony, the most masculine Wiggle, who wears blue. I could tell you how I want to strangle Captain Feather Sword, The Wiggles' Pirate friend who is the least believable pirate ever, but it is all too dark to go into. Suffice it to say that I am listening to The Avett Brothers at top volume to drown it away. I am loving these Avett Brothers so much that it makes me think I may need to do a "what I am listening to post" tomorrow.

Anyway, when Ivan went down for his nap, I crawled onto the trainer and rode while watching a documentary about American teenagers. I rode consistently for half an hour and that's really all I can say. The documentary was just depressing, and I am so glad I am out of high school and that I don't have to go back. Mercy, those times were ridiculous.

I got in a Gilad workout with some seriously painful ab work, and I put together my new chin-up bar and did three chin-ups before I headed into work. My goal is ten chin-ups, but I will tell you a secret: chin-ups are so hard. I barely got in three before work.

Work was great, though I had a little oatmeal cookie meltdown while I was there. Overall, though, I am eating like a champ for this stage of the holiday season. At home, I threw together a very mediocre dinner before attempting three more chin-ups, which ended up being two-and-a-half chin-ups. Chin-up total = 5.5

Knitting and watching Paper Heart tonight. All I have learned from Paper Heart is that I really like Michael Cera, and he is shooting way low. That is his thing, however.

Monday: Great Swim and Pearl harbor

Of course, I overslept this morning. Slack will be cut, as I was out a bit late at my swim party last night and then stayed up late reading The Elegance of the Hedgehog, which has taken a very interesting turn. The man who finds elegance in the hedgehog has moved into the apartment building and found out that there might be more to the concierge than meets the eye by hearing her quote a bit of Anna Karenina. "All happy families are alike...".

So, I overslept and arrived at the pool later than necessary. Anyway, I did dive in by about 8:50 AM. Jaime was there and also Jonathan, and I felt pleased that we got in a pretty good workout despite the general lateness. Workout as follows:

• 200 swim/ 400 pull
• 10 x 50 (odd fly/ even free) @ 1:00
• 4 x 50 (fly/free) @ 1:00
• 8 x 50 kick @ 1:00
• 4 x 50 breast strike @ 1:00
• 10 x 50 (odd breast/ even free) @ 1:05
• 5 x 100 pull @ 1:45
• 200 kick

This was 3100 meters; pretty good for getting there late. Ivan and I headed home to clean up the kitchen, have many snacks and wrap up Ebay packages for mailing. While cleaning up the kitchen, I noticed that Ivan was stalking about with a strange jangling in the pants leg of his footie pajamas. Of course, he had pilfered two more of the pepper Christmas ornaments from the tree and stuffed them down his pajamas. WHY? For what reason would a person stuff uncomfortable Christmas tree ornaments down his footie pajamas and shriek inconsolably when his mother tried to remove them.

If he were rational, I would say, "Ivan, if you stuff not one but two Christmas ornaments down your footie pajamas, you will be very uncomfortable.", to which he would reply, "Why Mother, you are exactly right. It is a great discomfort to perambulate about the premises with Christmas ornaments in my pjs. It just doesn't make sense. Please remove them, while I wait both patiently and gratefully. Thank you, Mother, Thank you!!!"

We have not yet reached the rational stage, and I am now adding Christmas ornament surveillance to the general suicide watch; also feline terror watch, as Ivan has learned how to kick and loves nothing better than to kick the cat. Hard times for all, be it man or beast.

Headed into work and made it home at a reasonable hour to put Ivan to bed with his favorite story and bedtime prayers.

Now, as opposed to Gilad or a trainer ride this evening, I chose to commemorate Pearl Harbor by watching Frank Capra's footage of World War II. It is rather amazing and a bit graphic, but necessary for garnering American support for the fight against Hitler. I have always heard about the war footage released by the successful director of "Its a Wonderful Life". It is a thorough explanation of American involvement in World War II. I am learning a lot and feel quite proud of Ole Frank Capra, of whom I think there is more than tear-jerking and romantic comedy-ing. He was born in Sicily, by the way, though he was having none of the sinister Mussolini, I assure you.

Aaahhh, patriotism!!!