Monday: Swim and Let's Just Talk About Holiday Eating, Because I Am Not Off To A Good Start

This morning, Ivan and I were off to swim, and I was in the pool in a timely fashion.  The water was quite cold today, and in the middle of practice the powers that be of the Williamson County Parks and Recreation department turned on the hot water to bring up the pool temperature.  There are no words to describe the great warmth and sense of hopefulness about life in general that I get when I finish a swim interval and get to hug a jet of toasty water while waiting for the next interval to start.  I would say that it is the same satisfaction I get from turning my electric blanket when it is cold outside or putting on my Uggs in the morning.  It is just a general feeling of well-being, and it makes me really proud for the caveman who discovered fire.  Workout as follows:

• 6 x 50 1:00
• 6 x 25 drill :30
• 4 x 50 drill
• 1 x 200 fast
• 4 x 50 drill
• 2 x 100 fast
• 2 x 50 distance per stroke
• 4 x 50 fast
• 400 kick
• 300 pull
• 200 pull
• 100 pull
• 8 x 25 IM

Anyway, swim is about all that happened today, as I was zapped of energy and I am pretty sure I know why: HOLIDAY EATING HAS BEGUN.

Now, I consider myself a healthy eater.  I take copious amounts of vitamins and drink loads of water, green tea and every once in while I get on a liquid chlorophyll kick, because it detoxes free radicals from our body and helps replenish our red blood cells.  Do I know what free radicals are??  Maybe not, maybe I can't remember for sure except that I think they cause wrinkles, and I am against that.

On Thanksgiving, however, things started to slide.  My mother made a cheese ball that involved bacon, and I, in a stupor of hunger one night, ordered two huge tarts packed in dry ice that we thawed out and plowed through on Thanksgiving.  Then my mother whipped heavy cream with sugar to put on the pumpkin pie, and suddenly I was stirring that delicious concoction into my coffee.

Then in a flash it was morning, and I was sitting down to more coffee with heavy whipping cream, a smoked salmon and goat cheese sandwich with a huge slab of pear tart with burgandy glaze for breakfast.

AND THEN, my mother packed up the pear tarts for me to take home, and I ate what I remember to be two slices of tart (though it could have been more, as I pretty much just unhinged my jaw and shoveled in huge amounts of tart) for lunch on the day after Thanksgiving.  I had a healthy dinner of broccoli and turkey, but is that really commendable after ingesting a month's worth of calories in one day in the form of tarts?

On Saturday, I was pretty sure I was back on target with an oatmeal breakfast and some turkey with roasted sweet potatoes for lunch, but after lunch the tarts were waiting on me.  So I made a deal with myself that I would get back on track on Monday, and it would be a new dawn and I would detox and have glowing skin.  I actually ate Yogurt World for dinner on Sunday night, and then planned that today would be my day of health, but no friends; that is not the way it works.

This morning I had sugar craving so intense, that I was forced to eat three of Ivan's gummy vitamins just to stave it off, and what kind of mother am I (I ask) if I cannot stop eating my child's gummy vitamins over a sugar craving.  Where does it end?  Do I drink his candy flavored tylenol in a shot glass or snort his strawberry kids shampoo.  It seems like a long circle around the drain of refined sugar.

Anyway, once home from swim I plowed through the queso that my husband bought for himself, and then it was onward and upward to a hidden bag of chocolate covered cranberries that I found in the kitchen.  I am staring Christmas in the face, and I am acting like a junkie. I have to get a hold on myself before I assault someone over a bag of m&m's.  This isn't pretty.

And then there is the ticking time bomb of cookie dough in my freezer that I bought from some cookie pushing child.  So, I have planned my eating for tomorrow.  I am pulling it together, and I am counting down to Christmas and I AM NOT TOUCHING THAT COOKIE DOUGH.