Nerd Alert: CBS Sunday Morning

So for many years, CBS Sunday morning was unknown to me.  While I was aware of its existence, I assumed that the only people who watched it were shut ins and agoraphobics and people to large to leave their homes without taking down a wall.  I just assumed it was how that sector of our population found out about the news on Sunday in a positive and judgement free environment.  Anyway, when I was in the hospital earlier this year on a Sunday morning with nothing to do but watch CBS Sunday morning, I discovered that it was the best show EVER.

It is riveting from beginning to end.  They always focus on a bit of news, an interview with an actor, some crazy weird trivia (like what goes into a Christmas pudding or where does "punch" come from or who is responsible for all the Christmas shop windows in New York) and t they end it with a moment of silence while showing you some amazing nature scene.

It is fast becoming my thing.  It is rare that I get to watch as church is my usual Sunday morning thing, so I DVR it.  I watch it every week, and I cannot even tell you the cultural knowledge about which I am becoming an expert.  AN EXPERT.  Would you like to know about the volital couple that supplied some of the story for The Black Swan movie, would you like to know all about the Chateau Marmont, are you interested in James Franco's new novel?  I have learned so many interesting trivialities.

Also, I LOVE IT that Mo Rocca is one their correspondents.  His diction is great, he is both polite and sarcastic, and he always wears such a look of humorous concern.

In the beginning of the show, the host, Charles Osgood, puts up a list of every segment they will cover in the show.  Then the various correspondents take their segment and proceed until they get to the end of the list.  It is very methodical, and this is a format with which I am most comfortable.  I do not like anyone springing a news story without forewarning me in the pleasant and reassuring tones of the unflappable Charles Osgood.

All in all, you must start DVRing CBS Sunday morning so that you can see where the 92 year olds are getting their cultural information.

PS- Punch was developed by British Sailors to make their hard liquor go farther when they were running low before the end of a voyage. They added whatever sugars and such to the mix, and then shared it amongst themselves.  So fun!!

Saturday: Day Off

So I cannot say that today was an intentional day off.  I decided to sleep late and sort of decided that I would go for a run in the afternoon, but I didn't, and then I thought about getting out the trainer, but I didn't  and then I thought I would at least get in a Gilad workout and I wimped out on that as well.  I have really devoted my ENTIRE day to needlepointing and watching Joan Rivers : A Piece of Work.  It isn't terrible to have a day like this, and it is freezing outside.

Now, Joan Rivers on the other hand, is INSANE.  The way she lives, how hard she works; all of it.  She works harder than anyone I have ever seen.  She has NEVER had a day like I had today.  She was working.  She was hocking jewelry on QVC, before hopping on a plane to do a show in Wisconsin, before  working until 2AM writing monologues in magic marker on her bathroom floor.

Her jokes are so dirty and so below the belt that she makes me super nervous.  Also, underneath it all, she is really rather grumpy and bitter.  She has, however, a lot to be both bitter and grumpy about.  She really sort of clawed her way to a spot on the Tonight Show, where she worked until Johnny Carson stopped speaking to her.  Her husband committed suicide and left her with a lot of debt, and she dug her heels in and pulled herself up by her bootstraps, and it is pretty impressive.

I would say that it was not all worth it, but her apartment in New York is STUNNING.  It is just beautiful, and it would kind of be worth the lifestyle.

Friday: Swim and Church Casseroles

This morning Ivan and I were at swim reasonably on time only to find the absence of our regular swim coach.  Now, I cannot help but realize that we have beaten our regular swim coaches (Dennis and Steven) down.  They have given up on trying to make us work hard.  They know that we will come to swim practice and refuse to do any fast intervals and probably kick a lot with our kick-boards so that we can talk about books and kids and such.  I can understand that we would be frustrating to our swim coaches and they would for sure give up.  

Today, however, Gretchen was our swim coach and Gretchen REFUSES to be beaten down.  If we try to shirk doing something, Gretchen refuses us.  She rarely lets us kick, and it is just her way.  Gretchen does not coach us very often, however.  If she did,  she might also get beaten down by our insistence on kicking and our refusal to do hard intervals or even attempt the butterfly or any sort of kicking without fins.  

Anyway, today Gretchen made us take off our fins and kick 20 x 25 with the kick board.  It was excruciating and my inner thighs were aching.  We also did 5 x 200 at a 1:20 pace, which I wasn't even making at the end.  It was a hard workout, and I need to do more hard swim workouts. I don't know if I should talk to Steven and just tell him to yell at us when we refuse to do something or tell us that we have to do it or what.  I think it would be hard to coach adults, as you can make kids follow orders but adulthood is a little more slack on the authority front.  SO, I guess it really comes  back to me needing to have the self discipline to follow a workout and not deviate from the workout based on personal laziness and my preference for kicking.

We got in about 3300 meters, and it was pretty great. 

At home, I spent my afternoon making three casseroles for the church freezer, so that they can take them to shut-ins and people who have had illnesses in their family.  I made a wild rice and chicken casserole, and when I finished it, I felt that the badness in these casseroles was more than any human system could tolerate.  I just do not feel that you can put mayonnaise, cream of celery soup, cheddar cheese together in any combination and think that things are going to turn out well for you.  

Albeit, I tasted one of the casseroles, and it was delicious in that scary way that means you might sit down and eat the whole thing without knowing what happened.  It was creamy and ambiguous when you tasted it, like you could not tell why exactly it was creamy.  Was it heavy cream, whipping cream, mayo, some strange cheese, or milk or what?  It tasted like the kind of thing that might be delicious after a long illness and your final arrival at home.  

Run and Gilad tomorrow!!

Wednesday and Thursday: Swim, Gilad, Run and Pure Barre

So on Tuesday, I was engrossed in Christmas thank you notes and neglected to tell you that I tripped over a space heater at my house, and it was more than painful and it has felt like an ankle sprain ever since.  It is my fault that in this age of central heat and air, I have a love affair with a space heater.   With all the things that sit on my floor and make sounds and emit light that belong to my child, it goes without saying that I did not need anything else on the floor.  In a stroke of true wisdom, I thought that adding another thing on the floor that involved an extension cord so that I could clothesline myself is exactly what I needed.

I did indeed clothesline myself and then tripped into the space heater itself and while I did not sprain my ankle, I fell against the space heater with the full force of my ankle.  It has been bruisy and sad ever since.  Anyway, I will recover from this.

Now, my plan was to pour my heart out about my miserable ankle experience last night on my blog, BUT the blogspot was down and there was not telling you all about it.  In the absence of my blog, I watched My Boy Jack, a new Masterpiece Theatre film which was just the saddest and most frustrating thing of all time, while I needlepointed.  (Masterpiece Theatre has a GREAT schedule this year, by the way)

Now, swim was great on Wednesday. I got in about 3300 meters and it was yesterday, so I cannot really remember what all went on.  I did enjoy it though and Jaime and I had a great conversation about Jonathan Franzen.   At home I got in a Gilad workout.

So that was yesterday.  Also, I gimped around on my sad ankle, and it is only just now starting to feel better.

Now, today was a busy day full of excitement.  It was my mom's birthday, so I dropped Ivan off at nursery school and then headed off to run some errands before meeting my mom at the mall to eat at the Cheesecake factory.  I find the Cheesecake Factory to be the best and worst place ever.  They have a menu full of  terrible and wonderful things.  It is sort of like Graceland, and just remarkable in its excess. You can get an alfredo pasta with all sorts of scary things and you can get an ahi tuna salad, loaded with delicious greens and a starter of edamame. We seem to always eat there on birthdays, and I enjoy it very much.

At home, I got Ivan into the jog stroller for a run and then hustled in a Pure Barre workout before calling it a day.  Am wiped.

Tuesday: Run and Pure Barre

Today, in an effort of Herculean self discipline, I ran at 6:30 in the morning.  It was warmer than I thought, so I was totally overdressed.  I felt like Rocky Balboa when you see him running all over the place in a full sweatsuit.  Other than being way too hot, it was a nice run.  It is so nice to get the run out of the way early and not have to fret all day about when you can get someone in to the jog stroller so that you can push his 30 pound self, plus all his blankets, his dog, his DVD player and a drink.

Now, when I run at home in the morning, it means that I then have to race back inside and hurtle around the house getting showered and prepared to take Ivan to school.  It was a race that I only barely won today, but we made it.  I then ran a myriad of errands before picking Ivan up, putting him down to nap and getting in a Pure Barre workout and working away all afternoon.  Tomorrow, I am officially off my Christmas schedule and returning to the real world.  Bleh!!

On a detox note, I am fully off the cookies and getting through the day powered by only a few dark chocolate m&m's and my regularly scheduled healthy meals.  Yay!!

Monday: Swim, Gilad, and New Year's Resolutions

So this morning, everyone overslept as our iphone alarms had some sort of New Year's glitch.  Even Ivan slept late. I had to make the coffee myself and for once in my entire life, I made a superb pot of coffee.  We made it to swim on time, but AS USUAL, I forgot that on the first gym day after New Year's everyone has to renew their emergency information in the nursery.  SO, I had to park myself in the nursery with a pen and paper and write down all possible phone numbers and contact persons, while my swim minutes ticked away.  However, all things considered, it seems best that the gym nursery have updated information so that I can ensure the safety of young Sloan, who has proved to be somewhat reckless with dare devil tendencies.  Accidents happen.

Anyway, I was on the pool deck, all systems go, at 8:50.  I got in and just swam the workout.  There were other swimmers, but I engaged in no chatting or whiling away valuable swim time.  In my hour and 10 minutes in the water, I got in 3300 meters, which was great under the circumstances.  I even did a bit of butterflying, and I kept my kicking to a minimum.  Workout as follows:

• 500 free
• 300 kick
• 300 swim
• 300 swim
• 300 pull
• 2 x 200 IM
• 300 pull
• 6 x 100 @ 1:45
• 300 pull

So, it was a lot of long yard sets, which helps when you are trying to get in yardage in a timely fashion.  

After swim, Young Sloan and I headed off to a fabric store to grab a couple of necessities. It all turned into a disaster of EPIC proportions when Ivan laid eyes on the button display and wrestled away from me to rip the top off a tube of pearl buttons which rolled ALL OVER THE FLOOR like a cartoon.  Everyone had to stand aside so that the slipping hazard could be cleaned and put back in the tube.  They were pale lime green pearl buttons, by the way.  Who would buy those??  Benny Hill for his crossdressing cardigan?? That is really all I can understand.  

Anyway, ugly buttons or no, it was a bad situation, because Ivan was like an overstimulated bull in a china shop.  He knocked over SEVERAL bolts of fabric, and at one point I had to sprint away from a conversation with a sales associate to retrieve him from the stockroom in the back.  It was a nightmare, Ivan and I both cried, consequences were delivered, and there was much screaming.  

At home, I felt it was a great relief to just sit on the couch and recover a modicum of my personal sanity and remind myself that I had, just two nights ago, worn a sequined mini-skirt.  Now, I am sitting here with a hole in my Uggs and a yet another deep gash in my self perception. To add insult to injury we were then forced to take a trip to Walmart, which was just so painful and crowded and full of hatefulness.  

Anyway, I did get a Gilad workout in, and I did make a really healthy dinner before parking myself back on the couch in my Uggs with a hole to think about my New Year's resolutions.  Last year, my New Year's Resolutions were pretty basic, get up earlier and read my one year Bible. I did a reasonable job of this.  I am not quite finished with my one year Bible, but I am very close and have read it all but for a two weekish span in the Old Testament somewhere.  I did get up a bit earlier for the most part, and was better about getting to swim on time overall.  

This year, I feel that my New Year's resolutions should be directed in the development of my character and culture, so that is where I am leaning.  I have not completely decided on my resolutions, but I am getting there.  

Sunday: New Year's Eve, New Year's Day and a Lovely Book Club Dinner

New Year' Eve:  So, for New Year's Eve we headed out to dinner with friends, but it turned in to some relative sadness.  It was one of those nights when I wanted to be glamorous and cool in my sequin mini-skirt, but I had to run screaming from the table to get home to the babysitter who was not allowed to be out past 11:00ish.  It made me feel less than cool, but then maybe that is what I need to accept about my current life: it is less than cool.  I can read all the great books and wear all the sequined mini-skirts that I want to, but I still have to drive the babysitter home while wearing my yoga pants.  I did get in a run and a Pure Barre workout on New Year's Eve, so at least I can keep wearing the sequined mini-skirt.

New Year's Day: Now, New Year's day went a little more smoothly.  I was up at 7:00 to meet up with my running group for a nice 7 mile run.  We chatted about books and Christmas presents and New Year's resolutions, and it was like a very pleasant cocktail party at 8:00 in the morning.  Post-run, we set up a picnic table and drank champagne, and snacked on bagels.  I brought bite sized whiskey puddings, and I will admit to you that they were a hit.

Isn't it fun that I could go to an early morning cocktail party and get in a good run.  It seems like the best way to live.

After my run, I rushed home and changed into some dry clothes to meet a friend for coffee.  So much fun!!!  Why don't I meet friends for coffee more often.  It was with my friend Melissa, and our parents knew each other before we were born.

Today!!: This evening, I hosted book club.  I ironed a tablecloth and mixed a special butter.  What a fun night, we talked about books around the table and read aloud passages from my most recent read The Times We Had.  It made for some dinnertime hilarity, and I feel a bit bad for disparaging poor old Marion Davies.  Marti made a rice-krispie treat disco ball!!! It was a party!!

After dinner, we retired to the drawing room for a discussion of what book to read next.  We chose Animal, Vegetable, Miracle, by Barbara Kingsolver.  I am kind of thrilled, because I will learn a lot about in season vegetables.

Swim tomorrow and I am contemplating my New Year's resolutions.  I will keep you posted.